just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
