i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
