Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
