we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
