Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?

  (213): View more from California

  Ya ya. Where you eating?

  (818): View more from California

  Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.

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  (818): Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out? (213): Ya ya. Where you eating? (818): Cereal and beer. U kno u want in. http://tfl.nu/3o1u
  Replies (4) Good night (1229) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.

  (1-609): View more from New Jersey

  Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.

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  (609): You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener. (1-609): Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts. http://tfl.nu/3zgr
  Replies (50) Good night (5630) Bad night (821)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom

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  (504): Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom http://tfl.nu/9j8t
  Replies (6) Good night (3967) Bad night (540)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.

  (1-503): View more from Oregon

  Marry him

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  (503): He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song. (1-503): Marry him http://tfl.nu/vquy
  Replies (39) Good night (9235) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.

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  (718): If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs. http://tfl.nu/jfp1
  Replies (24) Good night (4871) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me

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  (774): mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me http://tfl.nu/1umx
  Replies (12) Good night (978) Bad night (5650)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!

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  (510): EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT! http://tfl.nu/n28b
  Replies (22) Good night (1720) Bad night (5900)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?

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  (314): Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences? http://tfl.nu/kgto
  Replies (8) Good night (1327) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.

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  (858): No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter. http://tfl.nu/lm85
  Replies (17) Good night (3181) Bad night (862)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.

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  (920): fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome. http://tfl.nu/la0v
  Replies (5) Good night (2834) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.

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  (206): I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house. http://tfl.nu/11j4
  Replies (3) Good night (604) Bad night (1676)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.

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  (303): I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo. http://tfl.nu/muyk
  Replies (10) Good night (612) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.

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  (253): You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded. http://tfl.nu/x9oy
  Replies (2) Good night (866) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  I think that's justified.

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  (360): I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB. (1-360): I think that's justified. http://tfl.nu/5alt
  Replies (0) Good night (788) Bad night (208)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.

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  (608): I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation. http://tfl.nu/elh6
  Replies (0) Good night (480) Bad night (169)

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