Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize