David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
