He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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