I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
