SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
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