Your tits are I can't wait for
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize