I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I want her autograph on my taint
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
