im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
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I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
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Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Enjoy the penises
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
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