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• (443): View more from Maryland

  they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out

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• (951): View more from California

  I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of

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• (530): View more from California

  I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.

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