That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
