Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
