i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
