idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Randomize