That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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