Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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