In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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