My nipple is on Facebook.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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