i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Less talking, more tequila
the night ended with taco bell and tears
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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