Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
