his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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