Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize