There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize