just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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