is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
