there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I want to stick my p in your. b.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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