I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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