doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
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