She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize