I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Randomize