i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
