you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
my poor anus
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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