On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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