we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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