Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
