I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You brought string cheese to the strip club
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
