Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I need a beard to bite.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize