it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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