i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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