Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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