The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize