the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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