We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
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We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
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And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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