did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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