im drinking this country out of the recession.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
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