She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
only you would photoshop your dick
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
