he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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